Please the careful clothes mishandle flowers you the lipstick!

Is it possible to say this sentence without running out of breath? Or is it the brain protesting its absurdity? I cannot believe this sign was found in a Li Ning store – one of the country’s leading sports brands and founded by the Olympic gymnastics champion who lit the Olympic flame during the Beijing Games’ opening ceremony.

Toilet signs for college men

College was an amazing time in my life, filled with fond memories of crazy incidents. One of my oddest experiences happened during the year I lived in the men’s dormiory – and used its toilet.

We declined to bring your own drinks

I took a second look at this sign after my Chinese language classmate, an English language teacher from the US, pointed it out, snickering, to another American classmate. We were ravenous, waiting for lunch to be served at a Sichuan restaurant, so the thought of the place refusing to serve us what we ordered was almost hilarious.

Deformed man toilet? Fun, but more a culture shock

Hands up if you’ve ever bought a T-shirt or souvenir item with Chinglish words on it for your loved ones while travelling around the country. Did you hae any idea what the words meant? Or didn’t you care and just grabbed the thing because it looked cool?

May your satisfaction sincerely aroused by me

The only thing this one can possibly arouse is bewilderment, which can then lead to a headache after turning the words around and around to decode what they mean. (May your arousal be sincerely satisfied by me? This makes sense, but is a sign more at home in a brothel.)

All bark and no bite

Don’t fight with somebody who is albark and no bite because maybe they just use their nails instead of their hands.

Have a dog

It should be telling people to “stay away” because there are guard dogs inside. Instead, it is inviting people come closer with the lure of a free dog. And who does not want a free dog, especially if it is a tiny, furry, playful puppy?

Trust me, I did not fly a kite

Last week, I received a wedding invitation from one of my college classmates, Edison. He is marrying his long-time girlfriend Jojo, another classmate, next Saturday. The exciting news reminded me of their love story, which unfolded the year we graduated from university.

Advantageous noodle

This is an interesting way to look at nstant noodles.” But come to think of it, instant noodles do give whoever eats them an advantage.

Pain with a different kind of ‘ouch!’

If you have “a pain in the ass” , don’t go to see the doctor. The only thing you need may be your friends or your lover surround you to help relax.